A Bodey in Motion

Building momentum, one step at a time

Where’s Your Energy Going, and Why It Matters

An organization has only 100 percent of its resources and energies to spend. I have no idea what is meant when a manager says, “Let’s give it 110 percent!” There is a finite amount of energy, and the question is simple: is it directed toward internal, political issues, or toward external, client issues?

In the best companies I’ve worked with (or observed), the ratio is about 10/90. That is, 10 percent of the energy is abraded away internally, but 90 percent of it is directed toward sales, service, retention, market share, and so forth.

Alan Weiss, Million Dollar Coaching

There are times I have to leave the house and socialize with other people. As an introvert, that isn’t my natural state. Occasionally, it happens that I have to engage a group of people that I don’t really know (aka “strangers”), adding a level of emotional awkwardness. If I’m physically uncomfortable on top of that (i.e. my chair is at a weird angle, or personal space is limited, or I have a headache, etc.) where do you think the vast majority of my personal energy is focused?

energy

Obviously, in those circumstances, most of my energy is going to go into coping with the situation. Very little will be reserved for making new acquaintances, smiling, or being friendly. I’ll want to use my wife and kids as a shelter, rather than be aware of how they’re feeling, and I’d be filling my time by checking the clock and eyeing the door.

And that’s just one event in a lifetime filled with thousands upon thousands of various such twists and turns. In each of those moments, I’ll only have a limited amount of resources to fall back on. Each day – each hour – each second only has so much energy to expend. That time I spend at work, or at church, or at home, or volunteering – how will I use it? Where will it be focused?

It’s important to understand that. It really does matter.

See, organizational energy is a byproduct of individual energy. We each contribute a portion of the greater whole when it comes to directing the energy of our places of business, or service, or worship. Whether you’re in a family of five, a church of fifty, or a company of twelve thousand, your focus makes a difference on the internal to external ratio of that organization.

Do an audit of the energy being spent by that sleepy church in the Midwest with a slowly shrinking membership. Are they busy trying to keep the people within the walls happy, or are they zealously focused on serving their neighbors and beyond? How have their members affected their ratio? It might be helpful to do an audit of each of them.

And when we’re criticizing the organizations we’re a part of,  maybe we need to do an audit on ourselves.

Just a thought.

June 12, 2013 Posted by | Christ and Church, Marriage and Family, Politics and Other Insects, Work and Money | , , , , , , , , , , , , | Comments Off on Where’s Your Energy Going, and Why It Matters

FPU Lesson 2 – Relating with Money

The second week of class is all about you and your family and how all of you relate with money. Below are my notes from the lesson, including the key points that I highlight from the video when leading the class, and some supplemental material that I think could help the class go further on this topic.

Financial Peace Unversity

Lesson 2, Relating with Money

Key Points

Men and women tend to think very differently about money. Don’t act so shocked, you already knew this. Men use money as a way to measure success. But for a woman, it’s a source of security. In the midst of a crisis, each needs to be reassured in area of their fear.

The saver, spender, nerd and free spirit must get on the same page. You both make the financial decisions together! There’s a tendency to acquiesce and allow the more “responsible” or “numbers smart” partner to do all of the money management in a family. It’s bad for a relationship to have only one person acting like the adult. Both spouses get a vote on how the money is made and spent, and compromise is key to success.

If you’re single, find an accountability partner to discuss your finances with. Being alone can make it much harder to win with money. Pick a wise friend who is willing to hurt your feelings, and then allow them to do it. Don’t make a major money decision ($250 or more) without talking to them about it.

Teach your children how to manage money so they make smart decisions. It’s time to put an end to this bad habit we have of not talking to our kids about sex or money. It’s not the school’s responsibility to teach your kids about good money practices, it’s yours. Learn them, and pass them on.

Challenges

Start Saving. Begin putting something aside every month for an emergency. It doesn’t matter how much. You’ll be amazed how excited you’ll feel when you see that first $100 sitting in your savings account.

Checkbook Test. Where your money goes tells us what is important to you. What does your money say about you?

Problems Equal Opportunities. If money management problems are the top cause of tension in your life and marriage, they are the top area where you have an opportunity to improve.

Accountability. If you don’t have it, get it. Even if you are a couple. If you can’t be accountable to one another, then it’s time to get some outside help.

Go Deeper

Dave Ramsey reads a lot of books, and he often references them during each class. If there’s a text that I think the class would really benefit from, I try to include it as a part of the notes that I share.

  • Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus by John Gray
  • The DNA of Relationships by Gary Smalley

Next week, Lesson 3 – Cash Flow Planning. Making your budget work.

March 13, 2013 Posted by | Christ and Church, Marriage and Family, Past and Future, Work and Money | , , , , | 1 Comment

Five Rules for Facebook

While I’ve never been reluctant to use the Interwebs for everything from employment to entertainment to education, I’ll admit that I was initially very slow when it came to adopting the use of social networking. I had a bunch of excuses, but the fact was that it just another area in my life where I was resisting being open and sharing. Once I pulled my head out of my a…the sand and realized that I was missing a huge opportunity because of fear, I took the plunge and joined facebook.

Y'know, I think a more honest name for the site would be 'postblahblahblah' right?

Try not to judge too harshly, but I found those first few months of poking and posting to be kind of stupid. After sharing my pictures, playing the games, and trying the features, I realized that in order to use facebook in a way that would be representative of my life and values, while still being an effective tool for connecting and communicating with friends near and far, I was going to have to set a few ground-rules.

Now, obviously, these are my rules for using facebook. This is what I’ve come up with so far based on my experiences with social networking in general and facebook in specific. I’m not expecting everyone to adopt, or even respect them, but they work for me.

  • Rule #1 – Friend People You’ve Actually Met. Currently, around 98% of the people I’ve friended on facebook are individuals that I have spent face-to-face time with. Usually, that means more than 24 cumulative hours together at one time or another. If the current trend continues, that percentage will only go up, because exceptions to this rule are very rare and special, or they’ve been grandfathered in since it’s been enacted. Before I call you friend online, I want you to be one in real life.
  • Rule #2 – Don’t Friend the Opposite Sex Lightly. As a general rule, I don’t initiate online connections with single women or the wives of other men. If I do, I’m being intentional as to why I’m making the connection, and my wife knows about it ahead of time. If a woman  tries to friend me on facebook, I make my wife aware of it and she has veto power over my friend list (which she hardly ever uses). Giving my wife that much access has built trust, and helped me to avoid future issues with impropriety.
  • Rule #3 – Don’t Play Games. Facebook is already a drain on my productivity. I will not make it worse by farming for virtual crops or building virtual homes. Apart from an occasional evening on an MMO, playing games is something I do face-to-face with my family or with friends. Note: When I receive a game request on facebook, I actually do click it. Once I can navigate to the game’s application page, I can block it, and I never have to see it again. So, keep sending those requests.
  • Rule #4 – Ignore Chain Posts. At least twice a day, some picture or post will pop up in my facebook feed that all but commands me to like it or share it if I agree with the sentiment (i.e. “Share this if you have the best daughter in the world!”, or whatever.). No, thank you. I think my faith, ideology, family and life all deserve more thought and depth, and if I share something about any of those it will be crafted by me. (Unless I find it incredibly inspiring…or very, very clever and funny. Anyway, moving on…)
  • Rule #5 – Share With Care. I always try to be honest and real when I write something on the Interwebs, whether it’s here at ABiM for the entire world to see, or if it’s just to my friends on facebook. However, my good judgement only extends so far. So, I try to run everything I post or share through a few extra filters before it goes public.
    – Would I hang this on my office wall at home? Where the kids can see or read it?
    – Could I hang it at work? Would it reflect well on my career?
    – Would my wife approve of it? (I’ve asked her directly, at times.)
    – Would my Mom approve of it? (That’s actually a really bad filter, though.)
    There have been times each of those filters have kept me from posting something questionable. Especially my wife. (She kept me from goring a particular sacred cow on facebook last year, and I thank her for it.)  Of course, there have also been times when all of those filters have said “Don’t!” and I decided I needed to do it anyway.

And those are my core rules when it comes to facebook. (There are one or two other cursory rules that I use, but they’re conditional and not important here.) Obviously, each social networking option has different hurdles and struggles. Some of these rules aren’t applicable to twitter, for example, and even Google+ doesn’t quite work the same. It’s important, though, to always set some guidelines. You have a family, career and future to watch over.

What rules do you follow when you’re online? Which social networks do you use, and how do you use them? 

[Image Credit, slightly modified]

December 3, 2012 Posted by | Marriage and Family, Past and Future | , , , , , , , , , , , | 1 Comment